Myth vs Truth

Love:  n. (1) an intense feeling of deep affection  (2) a person or thing that one loves.
v.  a deep romantic feeling or sexual attachment to.  [courtesy of Webster's online dictionary]


After paying attention to some of the status updates I've read on facebook, I've come to the conclusion that 99% of the people I'm connected to all share one thing in common.  Love.  The endless search for it.  The endless need to feel it. The endless desire to understand it.  How do you define something that a lot of people don't know what it is, what it looks like, or what to do with it even if/when they find it.  Let's look at what the world teaches us about love.

"A heart that hurts, is a heart in love".  If you're in love with someone, it's supposed to hurt.  Why would ANYONE enjoy pain?  So this quote is saying, if you're hurting because you love someone, it's SUPPOSED to feel that way.  It solidifies that your love is real.  Thank you, but I'll pass on THIS type of love. 

"No one falls in love by CHOICE.  It's by chance.  No one stays in love by chance.  It's by work  And no one falls out of love by chance, it's by choice."  So I can fall in love with anyone, even if I'm already in a relationship with someone else, and say it's by chance.  If one can CHOOSE to fall OUT of love, why can't someone choose to fall IN love?  This kind of love would make a slave out of those that believe this love is the real love.  You don't have a choice.  I don't want to experience a love that I feel I'm a prisoner to.  Thank you, but I'll pass on THIS kind of love also.

In 2009, American Idol hopeful Jordin Sparks is found singing "Battlefield" on youtube.  In this song, she talks about how vulnerable she feels because she's in love. " One minute it's love and the next it's like a battlefield.  Why does love always feel like a battlefield?"  According to this song, better put some armor on if you find yourself loving someone.  You need to protect yourself since love is the same as war.  If you're always fighting a war with the one you love, it's OK.  It's normal.  That's what love is.  I HATE confrontation.  I do not want ANY part of THIS kind of love.

Love is defined in many ways in the Bible.  The first is found in 1 John 4:8 "God is love."  Love is one of the main characteristics of God.  Since we are created in His image, we are designed by Him to have the capacity to love.  God created our hearts which makes us feel.  He also created the Love that makes it real.  The Bible speaks of 2 kinds of love:  agape, and phileo.  Agape love is the kind of love God pours out onto us and is displayed by the cross.  Agape love is God's love which is unconditional. The only way for us humans to experience Agape love is to have a relationship with God.  Non believers are incapable of experiencing Agape love since God IS Agape love.  God's love is giving without the expectation of anything in return.

Phileo love is the kind of love that both believers and non believers can experience.  Phileo is translated from Greek as "brotherly love".   This is the kind of love that both believers and nonbelievers have the ability to feel.  As humans, we have a tendency to have conditional love.  We base how much we love by the emotions and actions of those around us.  As believers, we are called to exhibit the type of love that God has shown to us.  Since we as believers have the ability to experience God's love, we are taught to extend that love to those around us. 

The kind of love that I want to experience is that which doesn't make me prisoner, that which doesn't hurt, and that which doesn't feel like I'm fighting a war. 


THIS is the love I want to experience.  1 Corinthians 13:4-7  One that I can make mistakes and won't be held against me.  [it keeps no record of wrongs]  One that doesn't have an ulterior motive [it is not self-seeking]  One that will never fail [always perseveres]  We are imperfect beings incapable of ever producing anything perfect.  The only way to experience this perfect Love is through a relationship with the One that created it.  According to the Bible, Love is displayed by caring in action.  Love is not something we feel, but rather Love is something we DO.